Taking Your Relationships To The Next Level

I am continually reminded of how important strong relationships are. It is not just enough to know someone but to really know how you can work together. Whatever you call those people that have the same target market as you...whether power partners or power group, it is invaluable to take the time to really strategize on how you can work together for more business for both of you. So many businesses naturally work well together. For me being in the technology industry, I ask prospective clients the same questions that an internet provider may ask which is a perfect segway into finding out answers that relates to both of us and to also make those introductions when appropriate. But I also think outside of the box to what situations do businesses rethink their technology. A common situation is when a company is moving, expanding or even downsizing which can be an ideal situation for me. So perfect partners are a commercial real estate person, moving company, office furniture consultant or even an employment agency. These partners and I rely on each other to make introductions AND this dynamic group of contacts keeps each other informed on happenings in the market. By taking the time to deepen your relationships you will see rewards in great long term relationships but also with more business.

Having the Right Tools When Networking

Regardless of your sport or hobby, it is crucial to have the right equipment for the task. The same is true with networking. It is very important to have tools that will help you succeed and be productive.

Here are just a couple of things that I feel are important to have when networking.

Database. Whether you keep track of your leads with a simple or a sophisticated system, the main point is that you keep track of leads and people that you meet.

Business cards. After an event, I often have a slew of cards. After the cards are entered into my system, I date the back of the bundle and put the event name and the back of each card. These are then banded together and stored

Backup. It is quite difficult to network if you lose all your data. There are many affordable was to accomplish this, but the main thing is to get a plan in place.

With a few tools to match your networking needs, you will find you have time to enjoy one-on-one conversations and events.

Harmonious Relationships

All enduring success is founded upon harmonious human relationships.

Most of us are incapable of "going it alone." Whether it is in our careers, our personal relationships, or in life, we all need others if we are to achieve the level of success we desire. Besides, what’s the point of having it all if we have no one we care about to share it? You may choose to work with others, you may ignore them, or you may choose to work against them, but the greatest successes in life come to those who work harmoniously with others. When your personal goals coincide with those of another, not only does the power of your combined labors benefit you, but such cooperation also creates a synergistic effect that allows you to achieve far more than the simple sum of your individual efforts. Know that friendship freely given and gratefully received is one of life’s greatest gifts.

Networking Equals Giving

Networking is NOT about meeting someone and selling them something, it is all about giving.

Remember when you were a kid and you were told is it better to give than to receive? Well the same is true with networking.

We have all been at a networking event and met someone who only wants to talk about themselves. Their communication is truly one way....Me, me, me. They corner you and will tell you all about themselves and their business and never once asking about you or what you do. And when you finally get away from them, they are the first ones to follow-up with a phone call or email. Eek! These people are "takers" and have forgotten that networking is a two-way street. They missed the chapter that tells them how networking is the selfless art of facilitating introductions to help others. Yes, networking is all about giving, and not always about receiving. However, there is a lot to be gained in the process of networking. By helping others connect, you contribute to a world of common circles that can go in many new connections. In addition, you might just be surprised how your generosity turns into successful leads for yourself. Think of this process as "networking karma." For those who continue to wear "networking blinders," only thinking of how others can help them, they are missing many, many opportunities beyond their immediate sphere of influence. So, at your next networking event, keep in mind what you learned long ago about giving and receiving as you meet others, and watch how your connections grow.

It's All About the Little Things

Business networking is all about the little things. It takes more than having a onetime meeting, exchanging business cards and to leave then. It is all about building long term, enduring and strong relations with your referrals. Long term relationships demand long term planning and trustworthiness.

So give time to relations and build trust first of all. Even if you cannot do big things for each other, small action can generate big results. Little things are very important in our lives. A little smile that we can put on someone’s face may brighten his day. Even something as simple as a followup note or email. A greeting card on someone’s success may make him smile and happy for the whole day. So never try to get the fruits of networking in some days. It takes several years to build trust in relations, but just a moment to break it.

Experts in business networking visualize the networking process as a series of small steps and efforts. Small efforts can lead to big trustworthy relations in future. Big steps at the initial stage of business may be harmful in future. The expectations you might have from other person may not be fulfilled. The best approach and philosophy is to take time and develop strong relations over time. Help each other in simple but effective ways on the course of this journey. Little things can add big happiness to others life and hence strength to your relations. Throughout this journey, you form links and associations with others and help each other in little ways. But no doubt, little things have the potential to generate big outcomes over the long run.

Each referral, each little step to help each other and each joint effort serves as a big support for the growing business and its success.

What networking is not

I was at a networking function recently and was remind of the funny things people do when at a networking event. These are just my observations of what NOT to do when networking.

• NOT a place to find a date. Save that for the dating circles.


• NOT a place to come and plant yourself at the buffet table for a food free for all.


• NOT a place to grip even to your closest friends.

Remember that networking is about relationships, not events. Networking is not usually stressful if you are focusing on building relationships and having fun. If you want to build mutually beneficial relationships that will help your career and your company, just be yourself and look for ways to help everyone that you meet.

The Value in a Good System

Headaches are caused when we don't have good systems. Broken systems lead to disorganization, confusion, and chaos whereas smooth systems allow us to move quickly and efficiently.

The importance of developing good systems in your personal and professional leadership is invaluable to your success in networking and in your life. The exact systems that work for me may not pertain to you. It's up to you to find the systems that will benefit you the most. Yet, regardless of what your systems look like, you would be wise to design them if you intend to grow in influence.

What Is a System?
A system is simply your way of getting things done. Systems aren't one-time acts; they're habits that you do weekly or even daily. They're the mechanics of leadership, and over time, they dictate the extent of your effectiveness.

The Value of Systems
1) They Help Us Manage Time - A heavy workload and increasing demands on time can force you to learn how to get things done quickly. It is vital to develop systems to squeeze as much productivity as possible into they day. As Peter Drucker wrote, "Everything requires time. It is the one truly universal condition. All work takes place in time and uses up time. Yet most people take for granted, this unique, irreplaceable, and necessary resource. Nothing else, perhaps, distinguishes effective executives as much as their tender loving care of time."

2) They Help Us Conserve Energy - When we have good systems in life, we don't waste energy. Do you know the number one waster of time? Looking for things that are lost. A study by Office World News found that the average executive squanders 150 hours each year looking for misplaced files.

3)They Help Us to Maximize Progress - Systems help us to move forward, to go as far as we possibly can. They enable us to work faster, smarter, and more strategically. A good system eliminates waste, while it also anticipates and removes obstacles.

To get the most out of systems, you have to make them a lifestyle not a one-off deal. They must become ingrained in your routine. Systems only benefit you when you stick to them.

What Is In a Handshake

I was at an event recently and I received the worst handshake ever. I will not easily forget that person, at least not until the bruise on my hand goes away.

A good handshake can make or break your first impression. In order to be a successful individual, one needs to focus on manners and etiquette and a proper handshake is part of it. A personable handshake involves a strong grip, maintained eye contact and deliberate pumps up and down. A lazy handshake makes you appear disinterested, sort of like a five-fingered yawn. If you're overzealous, however, it's distracting and annoying. I am not going to sit here and explain the details on a good handshake as there is plenty of info online, so do the research yourself. I was amazed on how much information is out there on the subject.

Always end your hand-shake with a pleasant smile and eye-contact. A handshake is just a simple gesture, but it is an important part of etiquette which every social being should learn.

Benefits and Features

If you don’t get the difference between features and benefits, that’s OK. Not a lot of people really do. Realizing the difference can certainly give you a leg up on those that you network with and potential customers to better understand your business. Ask why whatever it is you’re thinking about is important to your customer. When you arrive at an answer that even you have found your benefit. Take the products and services that Nextrio (my employer) can provide, we offer so many features that no one can remember them all or even try to understand them. But if I say that we provide predictable costs to manage their networks...talk about the value of your features, then you can almost see the lights of understanding go off when talking to someone.

Networking is a Journey

Networking is a journey. It takes time. It takes energy. It takes work.

When networking first officially appeared on my job description I was a bit intimidated. I mean the thought that I HAD to go out there and network, attend networking events and meet people, certainly made me rethink my approach to these activities. After much nail biting and literally pushing myself out there I realized a very important thing. I was already very actively networking and had been for years, I just didn't necessarily use the term networking for what I did. I now think back at how networking had not only helped me find employment when moving from Denver to Tucson, but as I moved around the country in previous years, I used networking to help me find the resources that I was in search of for both business and personal. Networking is a much better way to find a reputable resources for a product and service than many of the traditional ways that we research for a service or the impersonal way that many of us research for services we need today. They all have their purpose, but I want, demand and need that personal touch. I want a relationship.

I then took all those past networking experiences and continually fine tune or build upon them. I had to find what group or groups that worked best for me. One person cannot attend every event and belong to every group. That is why first pick the group(s) and event(s) that work and then rely on some powerful partnership that I have created whereby we work as a team. These partnerships also need communication to share information and build those relationship. Networking takes time and work, but the rewards pay off.

The Importance of Partners

How do you keep abreast of what is going on the market? One person cannot know everything that is happening that may be an opportunity for new business nor can they attend every networking event trying to connect with more people. Luckily for me, I do not have to figure that out as I rely on partners in the networking circles. One way I do this is that I am associated with a leads or referral group. I thank my lucky stars that I have found one that works for me and my company (http://www.businessleadsofamerica.com/). The purpose of this group is to exchange business leads. This group's concept takes it to the next level by creating a community of associates and friends. So I have 20+ people that I get together with weekly and have created strong bonds with. There are also people within this group that I feel are "power partners" for me, meaning partners that are looking for the same type of client that I am (type, size, location, industry). We are each other's eyes, ears in what is going on in certain target industries that we share. We keep in touch and share information so that we both win with new business in the end.

It's Not Who You Know, But Who Knows You

Networking is such an important part in the business cycle that I always have a book close by to read on the subject. My current read is The Little Black Book of Connections by Jeffrey Gitomer. I am not plugging the book, I just find good info in most things that I read and why not share it with others.

Anyway, I used to always hear that it is important to know lots of people...who you know. But when you think about it, it is really about who knows you. Who sees you as a person of value in the marketplace?

If you make yourself valuable and memorable, others will want to make you part of their network.

Networking One-ON-One

I did say One-On-One, not 101. What is a one-on-one?

I had the recent experience to be asked from someone from another chapter of my referral/leads group to get together for a One-On-One. I wasn't too surprised since there was not anyone in my category in his chapter. When I arrived, the person that I was meeting was ready with pen and forms in hand just to provide me a quote on the products and services that his company offered.

The above example is NOT a one-on-one. A one-on-one should be a casual meeting in order to get better acquainted. That's it.

When participating in networking events, it's often tough to get up in front of people to talk about yourself or find the people with whom you really want to talk to. One-on-one meetings are a great next step when with those that you meeting when networking. I often find that I meet people at events that I want to take it to the next step in getting to know them for a variety of reasons.

What is the best way to handle the situation if you find yourself in a situation where it becomes the "hard sell" and not a one-on-one? The best advise that I could possibly give is to be honest with the person as to not waste your or their time. In my case, I think the person was new to networking and really didn't know what a one-on-one meeting was.

The Best Places to Network

We have all read those top ten lists of the best things to do or the best places to visit, but have you ever thought of a top list of the places to network? I am sure we would all say association events whether a chamber or trade association or even at a referral group. But let's look outside the normal and think outside the box. With networking, the possibilities to network are just about almost anywhere. I have networked at my church (not during the service), at sporting events, while walking my dog and I even met someone at the gym that has become a great person referral source. Anywhere you strike up a conversation with others, whether you know them or not, is a great place to network. So when you think about that next networking opportunity don't overlook your social club, the kid's soccer game or even with the person sitting next to you on an airplane.

Ten Commandments of Networking!

This is worth repeating. If you want to gain the most out of business networking, follow the Ten Commandments of Networking!

1) Thou shalt drop the "what is in it for me?" attitude.
2) Thou shalt listen.
3) Thou shalt build a relationship.
4) Thou shalt give the first referral.
5) Thou shalt not tell others of the referral you require; thou shalt "show them" with a story.
6) Thou shalt be specific of the type of referral.
7) Thou shalt reciprocate when appropriate.
8) Thou shalt participate in the network executive, functions, and network time.
9) Thou shalt thank the person who gave a referral.
10) Thou shalt follow up on the referral within 24 hours.

Selling vs Marketing in Networking

Is networking selling? The term network marketing confuses people. Network marketing or multi-level marketing generates sales through a layered network of product representatives. Each of these representatives is given incentive to recruit still more committed reps. Multi-level marketing sales pitches can come across as vague and evasive.


Networking is marketing. When you network you are building a network of people who know about you and the products or services you sell. They might buy from you or help you. Networking is a long-term strategy, not a quick-sell scheme.

One Networking Truth

Networking Myth : It is better to give your card to everyone in the room. If people aren't interested they won't keep your card, let alone call you.

The Truth: It is more important to get business cards than to hand yours out. After you identify a prospect, ask for their card. Mark the ones that are important to you. When you have their card you control the contact. Add the names and contact information to your database and follow up.

Speed Business Networking

I recently attended a mixer and was quite surprised as it turned out to be a Speed Networking event. It was quite fun. After a little research I found out that speed networking events are one of the fastest-growing forms of structured networking in the world. Major trade associations are incorporating speed networking events into their trade shows.

Traditional networking events can sometimes be unproductive as people tend to gravitate towards those they may already know, never getting the opportunity to meet others who could be great business contacts. In speed networking the environment is structured and attendees interact with many individuals that you may have never otherwise had the chance to network with. Since each face to face speed networking session lasts only a couple of minutes, you will not get stuck in an unwanted long conversation trying to figure out how to end a conversation.


I think this is a great way to meet people that you may not have otherwise crossed the room to meet. I think that speed networking can work if it's done the right way. It can be a fun, energetic and dynamic way to further your own goals of having a thriving, successful word-of-mouth-based business. The downside to speed networking is to thinks this is "all" a person has to do to network effectively. The key to making speed networking work, is to take the contacts made and develop them over time into "credible" relationships that lead to "profitable" referral partners.

Networking to obtain a job

Networking is a helpful and very useful way to help people get a job. Searching online, I read that The U.S. Department of Labor says this about how people obtain jobs:

5% find jobs through help-wanted ads on the Internet and in print publications;

24% obtain jobs through contacting companies directly -- the cold-contact method of job-hunting.

23% obtain jobs through such means as employment agencies, college career-services offices and executive-search firms.

The remaining 48% obtain their jobs through referrals -- that is word of mouth. How do they get referrals and find out about jobs through word of mouth? By networking.

There are several networking events each month around town that are free or very reasonably priced to attend. So don't overlook the networking way to increase your chances of landing that next job.

The Power in Partners

I did say Partners. I am talking about Power Partner. What is a Power Partner? Better yet, who are my Power Partners and why do I need them?

Power Partners are the people who sell to the same types of customers as you. In my industry of telecommunications, a couple of my Power Partners are office furniture sales and moving companies e.g. both typically sell to companies who are upsizing or moving and are of a certain size.

Power Partners can be one of the HUGE keys to starting a successful network. In order be successful in networking, it is very important that you develop excellent Power Partner relationships. A Power Partner is not necessarily a potential customer (though they might be). A Power Partner sells to the same potential customers that you do.

So take a moment, better yet, take several moments as this is important and figure out who are your Power Partners and start getting together with them regularly if you are not in a formal leads group. If you are in a leads group, invite your Power Partners to join. The giving has to go both ways or it is not a Power Partnership. What makes the partnership powerful, and lasting, is that you are able to help each other.

Learn the Art of Ending a Conversation

Have you been at a networking event and “gotten stuck” with someone? You want to move on and meet other people, and you have no idea how to do so politely. It appears that the other person would also like to network with others, and, she, too, fidgets nervously rather than ending the conversation.

You’re not alone. Many people are so concerned with starting a conversation that they give no thought to extricating themselves.

Your last words are as important as your first words. Plan and rehearse (if necessary) exit statements. Since at least 90 percent of your message is communicated through your body language and vocal tone, rate, pitch and inflection, keep an “open” stance and sound upbeat. You can easily tell the difference between people who say, “It was nice meeting you,” and you think, “Yeah, sure” vs. those who sincerely say, “It was nice meeting you.”

When do I exit the conversation?

Watch for that body language, but here are some sure signs:

• When the other person’s eyes noticeably begin wandering around the room
• When others shift their stance toward other people in the room or toward the door
• When the conversation lags
• When the other person repeatedly answers in a monotone with nothing words like “interesting.”

How do I exit the conversation?
• Ask for the other person’s card if you do not yet have it.
• Set up a time to call or meet with the other person.
• Excuse yourself shortly after another person has joined the conversation.
• Be up front. Be cordial and begin your remarks with “It has been nice talking with you and …
I will keep your card on file for when I need …”
It’s my first time here, and I would like to meet some of the other members, too.”
I can only stay for an hour, and I want to say “hi” to several other people.”
I’d like to continue this conversation. May I call you next week?”
I’ll e-mail you that referral tomorrow.”

And when all else fails:
“I want to get something else to eat (or drink).”

Say Good-Bye to those that you met
Plan time at the event to say good-bye to those that you met. Keep it short, upbeat and positive, and always use people’s first name (which you will have remembered!).

Networking for Everyday Life

In today's economy, job seekers need an edge beyond their experience, education and specific industry and job-related skills, in order to find and secure a position. Regardless if you are looking for an opportunity as CEO, IT Manager or Customer Service Representative, you need effective tools to compete within a market that is job-poor and candidate rich. Hundreds of articles and seminars have been offered describing the value of networking as being the most effective tool for finding your next position. Networking isn't new, we all network to some extent to find a new doctor, meet new people socially, to expand business contacts and many other aspects of our everyday life. The question is – can networking really help you find a job?

When I think about my years of work, my experience networking began without really understanding that I had begun to use networking as a tool. My current job with Nextrio did come about because of networking. I was looking for a job and I knew the owners of Nextrio and called them to see if they knew of anyone that who would benefit from my skills. Their answer was that they needed someone with my skills and created a position for me. Wow, did that ever blow me away. That doesn't always happen that way, but I am certainly glad it did for me. Think about the people that you know. Your contacts may be friends, neighbors, local business owners and people you meet everyday. Networking is all about building contacts that are well connected in the business world, who understand the power of personal referral and who are willing to help and provide additional contacts. The challenge is to reach people that understand networking and how it works.

Use your business contacts wisely and treat them with respect. Offer them advice, referrals, articles of interest and information that might be helpful to them personally or to their business. By doing so you will build and retain life-long viable business contacts. It is so important to give something back and develop a relationship that complemented both yourself and your contact.

Sometimes you will need to educate your contacts about the types of companies that you want to reach and how these people can help you uncover potential opportunities. Seeking out individuals who are well connected in the business world, open to talking about themselves, their companies, giving advice and directing you to other business people, are the primary targets for your network. Even though every person you talk to may not be able to help you right away, they may be an excellent contact later on, or they may refer you to well connected business people.

If you are networking effectively, you will find opportunities that you otherwise may never have found. Networking will not only help in a job search and with business, but it will add significant value and tools you will use in your everyday life. Do yourself a favor – start learning about networking and how you can apply it to your job search, business initiative or unique requirements.

Using The FORD Method in Your Follow Up

How you follow up with a new connection is as important as when you follow up. To be unforgettable people follow up quickly and mention specific comments about your interaction. Most agree that 24 to 48 hours is the maximum amount of time you should allow to initiate a follow up, especially if you are interested in furthering the relationship.

When you are following up, remember to reconnect, reestablish why you sensed common ground and explore - DO NOT SELL! You still aren't at a point where the new contact is ready to hear you launch into a sales pitch. Focus on how you can help them and putting them in touch with others in your network. Engage in meaningful dialogue. (Remember F.O.R.D.) Ask questions about their Family, Occupation, Recreation and Dreams.

The meaning of networking

N stands for Meet new people and nurture your current network relationships.
E stands for Have empathy when you meet and work with people, look them in the eyes and know when it is time to exit.
T stands for Trust is critical. No one will help anyone else unless we have established trust and respect, something that takes time. Also, talk less and listen more.
W stands for There is work in the word network. Work pays off.
O stands for Organization is crucial. Everyone you meet is a new opportunity to learn and be a resource.
R stands for Reputation is also important when networking. We want to establish rapport and build on the relationships we develop. Learn to reflect.
K stands for Knowledge is power only with execution. Kindness is a true strength.
I stands for Integrity is everything. Become truly interested in those you meet.
N stands for Sometimes we have to say “no.” Reputation is everything, along with trust. There are times when we have to go with our gut.
G stands for Set goals for yourself as you continually network. Be generous with your time and help. It will come back to you in the end.

Networking is a Process

I heard someone recently say that networking is a process and I just had to put some thought into that statement. Networking is a conscious process, not an accident or coincidence. Anyone who thinks that if they go to just one event and the business will come rolling in are in for a rude awakening. Networking is work, but is can be your most important business skill. Every time you meet people, there is an opportunity to learn from them and be a resource to them, as well. Networking is not about an immediate gain. Sometimes it can take years to cultivate, I said years not days. As important as trust is, it takes time and patience to generate.

Can You Hear Me Now? The Art of Listening

Hearing isn't the same as listening. Listening is the act of hearing attentively.

Listening is an art. Listening is an activity. Listening is being sincerely interested in hearing what the other person has to say. When you listen to people, you're letting them know you value them and their thoughts and ideas. You'll go further in life by being a good listener than by being a good talker. Once people realize you are willing to take the time to listen to them, true communication begins to take place.


Listening involves paying attention and understanding what is being said, even if it means repeating what you heard or asking questions. Nonverbals play as big a role in what is being said as the words themselves, so you watch for body language, too.

Follow-Up is the Name of the Game

A lack of follow-up can kill more businesses than any other factor. We fail to follow up on leads or to stay in touch with current clients and with past clients. I think this causes us to miss out on new sales opportunities, repeat business and referral business.

It's time to do something about these missed opportunities. I looked at solutions as there are many out there. Try some, ask others what are working for them. The point is to do something.

Here are some interesting fact that I found online from several sources:

• 48% of sales people never follow up with a prospect
• 25% of sales people make a second contact and stop
• 12% of sales people only make three contacts and stop
• Only 10% of sales people make more than three contacts
• 2% of sales are made on the first contact
• 3% of sales are made on the second contact
• 5% of sales are made on the third contact
• 10% of sales are made on the fourth contact
• 80% of sales are made on the fifth to twelfth contact

These are pretty inspiring arguments for following up. I guess you could say that once or twice is just not enough.

Are you a collector or a connector?

Have you ever been at a networking event and met someone who didn't want to talk, they just went around the room asking everyone for business cards? Networking is all about making that connection with others rather than seeing whose business cards you can collect. To me it is quality versus quantity. I would rather have one conversation with someone that is a potential client or a good lead source than to meet ten people that that are only interested in making that sale.

Conversation Starters

Meeting people for the first time can be hard. What do you say? Here are some conversation starters that have worked for me.

• How did you get into your line of work?


• What about the profession interested you?


• What major changes do you foresee in your industry?


• What have you found to be the best ways of getting the word out and promoting your business?


• I meet people frequently, tell me: How would I know if someone I meet would be a good contact for you? (Every question delivers an impression about you, so ask questions that make you look smart, informed and concerned.)

People do business with those they like and trust. In every interaction and every conversation be that person!